Al's Triple Threat Hustle (Bluegrass)

Lyrics

[Verse 1]
(Male Vocal)
Al, that cabrón, thinks he's Shaolin's best,
But he spent sixty years puttin' us all to the test.
Twenty years swingin' hammers, twenty killin' roaches,
Another twenty truckin', before his prostate approaches!
He ain't even fifty, that fucker's a blur,
Steals your tequila, then calls you a cur.

[Chorus]
(Duet)
Ay, Al, you lying son of a bitch,
Always got a story, always got an itch.
Blames his damn kids for the beer that's all gone,
While he's smilin' and connivin' 'til the break of dawn.
Your back's fucked up? My ass, you old faker,
Then you lift a whole quad, you back-breakin' heartbreaker!

[Verse 2]
(Female Vocal)
He’ll throw you under the bus for a dime, a peso,
Then pat your back, "Amigo, you know how it goes."
Drinks your horchata, leaves just the foam,
Says "My little Juanita, she took it all home."
He’s a master of deceit, a true king of the con,
You trust that man once, and your shit will be gone.

[Chorus]
(Duet)
Ay, Al, you lying son of a bitch,
Always got a story, always got an itch.
Blames his damn kids for the beer that's all gone,
While he's smilin' and connivin' 'til the break of dawn.
Your back's fucked up? My ass, you old faker,
Then you lift a whole quad, you back-breakin' heartbreaker!

[Bridge]
(Male Vocal)
He cries like a baby, says he's on his last leg,
Then he's humpin' equipment, without a single peg!
That man’s a machine, fueled by pure spite,
Just don’t leave your wallet or a woman in his sight.

[Outro]
(Duet)
¡Ay, Al! ¡Pendejo! ¡Qué cabrón!
You'll never change, from dusk until dawn!
Go on, lift that quad, you trickster so sly,
But don't come near my fridge, or you're gonna die!